


call me anytime ;)

by sanhascroissant



Category: ASTRO (Band)
Genre: Bad Flirting, Based on a Tumblr Post, Best Men, Crack Treated Seriously, M/M, Wedding, bad language, best man! Bin, myunjin wedding, saw a bullet fic on tumblr by astrofireworks and was inspired
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-12
Updated: 2018-02-12
Packaged: 2019-03-17 08:29:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,156
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13655265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sanhascroissant/pseuds/sanhascroissant
Summary: Bin is the worst best man ever. (But so is Rocky, so it's not all on him!)





	call me anytime ;)

Moon Bin tried not to feel apprehensive as he sat in the coffee shop, hands curled around a warm drink. MJ and Jinwoo were just across the table, and Rocky was fidgeting at his side, full of anxious energy. Moon Bin didn’t blame him, but he wished he wouldn’t act so outwardly nervous, it was making him nervous, now they were _both_ nervous. 

MJ was the one to break the silence. “I’m sure you are all wondering why we have gathered you here today,” He said. Bin rolled his eyes and took a sip of his drink. 

“Goddamn, MJ, way to put me at ease. It sounds like you’re pregnant or something.” His eyes widened, having reached an epiphany, and he leaned forward. “Oh god, you guys are pregnant, aren’t you?”

Rocky sat bolt upright, eyes wide. “Oh my god, we told you guys to practice safe sex -” Bin nodded vehemently beside him.

“No, what the fuck,” Jinwoo interrupted, mild disgust evident. “We’re here to tell you that MJ said yes, and we’re getting married.” MJ grinned, pulling up their clasped hands from underneath the table.

“Surprise,” He said, and smiled widely as Bin and Rocky _fucking lost it_. 

———

The months leading up to the Myungjin Wedding, as MJ had so dubbed it, were surprisingly laid back. Bin had been out of his mind relieved to find that neither MJ nor Jinjin were planning to be a Godzilla bride (or groom, he supposed.) 

So a week before the wedding he and Rocky were relaxing, a drama playing on the TV as they lazed around. It was a weekend, and afternoon light streamed through the windows into Bin’s face but he couldn’t be bothered to move. He was comfortably lying across their couch, feet in Rocky’s lap, wearing a ratty sweatpants and shirt and feeling perfectly at ease. The ideal Sunday. 

“Wow, Bin. Our best friends are getting married,” Rocky said, and his voice was reverent. Bin shifted up onto his elbows to look blearily at Rocky, who seemed a bit shocked. 

“Well, yeah,” He said, snorting as he let himself fall back down onto the couch. He looked up at the ceiling. “We’re their best men.”

“Shit, man. We are,” Rocky said, and they fell back into silence. 

Bin frowned. Something had begun to nag at him. Something he’d said, something crucially important that he’d _forgotten_ -

Bin jerked upright, flailing and nearly falling off the couch, kind of choking.  

“Minhyuk, we’re their _best men_ ,” He gasped. Rocky just frowned, confused. 

“Um, yeah. We are. We just had a whole conversation about it,” Rocky pointed out. Bin just shifted up further, grabbing Rocky by the shoulders. 

“No, Minhyuk, you don’t understand,” He said urgently, fingers twisting into Rocky’s shirt. “We’re their _best men_. We stand beside them at the ceremony to bear witness to one of the most important events _of their lives_.” Rocky frowned. 

“I’m still not following you Bin,” He said. “I already knew all of that -” Bin cut him off, placing a finger over Rocky’s mouth. “Hey -” He tried to speak around Bin’s finger, but Bin just interrupted again. 

“If we’re their best men, _we need tuxes_.” Rocky’s eyes widened. There had been so much preparation done. The flowers were ready, venue booked, the flower girl’s dress altered, reception planned, caterer hired, and photographer all lined up. But somehow, amidst all of those wedding plans, he and Bin, the fucking best men, had forgotten to buy and/or rent goddamn tuxes. It hit Rocky at that moment that they were the worst friends alive.

“ _Shit_ ,” He said emphatically.

“Their wedding is five days from now, and we’re working all week,” Bin said grimly. “ _Shit_ doesn’t even begin to cover it. We need to go _right now_.”

———

And so Rocky found himself in a mall, watching Bin try on what must be the hundredth tux of the day. Additionally, it looked remarkably similar to the ninety-nine other tuxes before it. So what the fuck were they still doing here? Rocky had chosen the first one that he tried. The very first. So why was Bin out here being all perfectionistic? 

When he asked why he didn’t just pick one and go, Bin let out a long suffering sigh. “Rocky, I’m not you. Not everything looks fantastic on all people. You’re just one of those lucky mutants who everything looks good on.” Rocky frowned. 

“I don’t think -”

“Rocky,” Bin cut in, looking deadly serious. “You once dressed up as a salt shaker for a halloween party and somehow looked hot as hell. It wasn’t even like a weird attempt at a sexy costume - it was all boxy and cheap and probably from Walmart, yet you still got laid. Don’t even talk to me.” 

And so Rocky was stuck here, listening to Bin ramble at him. _Does this accentuate my shoulders right? Does it make my ass look good? How about my waist?_ Rocky’s answer to all of the above was yes. Bin looked equally as hot every time he emerged from that godforsaken dressing room, and Rocky was reaching the breaking point. Bin sighed at Rocky’s noncommittal answers and just went back into the dressing room. 

Rocky slumped over and rubbed his temples. He was _starving_. Surely Bin wouldn’t mind if he went to grab something from the food court? Thinking about it, he knew Bin would definitely mind being abandoned, but he would surely be forgiven immediately if he brought back food for him. The way to Bin’s heart had always been through his stomach. 

And so, with only a mild pang of guilt, Rocky cast one last look at Bin’s dressing room door and then snuck away to grab something to eat. 

———

Dongmin could not believe that this was what he was spending his precious time doing. Sanha grinned beside him as Dongmin complained, apparently finding his pain amusing, the brat.

“Hyung, I need a blazer for this competition, you know I do. And you know mom would literally never let me go shopping for it all alone.”

“Okay but why me? You have friends. I have work to do,” Dongmin complained. He did not, in fact, have work to do, but what Sanha doesn’t know can’t hurt him. If it guilt-tripped Sanha into freeing him and calling up one of his friends instead, Dongmin would gladly sacrifice his moral integrity. Unfortunately, Sanha wasn’t as much of a fool as Dongmin had hoped.

“Yeah, you sure do,” Sanha snarked, grinning evilly. Dongmin just knew he was about to be roasted. “You need to work on getting your social life together, work on getting a boyfriend, work on getting some financial stability -”

“Okay, okay, shut up,” Dongmin said, trying not to flush angrily at the teasing words, coming straight from his younger brother. Dongmin was unbelievably lame. He still let _Sanha_ annoy him after all this time. 

Don’t get Dongmin wrong. He was thrilled that Sanha had passed his audition and that he was now competing at the national completion. He was elated that his baby brother was one of the best guitar players in the nation. But damn, why did they have to insist that he wear a blazer? And more importantly, why did fashion-obsessed Sanha feel the need to buy a blazer? Didn’t he already have, like, twenty, last Dongmin checked?

But no, apparently this was an “ _extremely important event and an extraordinary honor, Dongmin, I’m_ not _wearing anything I’ve ever worn before, it would be sacrilegious._ ” Dongmin wanted to argue with Sanha, but just ultimately decided against it. Sanha helped plan his outfits half of the time and on Sanha-Outfit days he was ten times more likely to be asked out, so he never pushed his brother when he came to fashion. He must be doing something right.

Unfortunately, that lack of spine had gotten him roped into this shopping trip, taking place on one of Dongmin’s precious days off. So sorry if he felt a little bitter. 

They walked into the store and Sanha browsed for awhile. Dongmin just trailed after him, sighing as Sanha piled blazer after blazer into his arms.

Finally, he seemed satisfied. He turned to go to the dressing room and Dongmin did his best to follow him, a difficult task since he could barely see around the pile of blazers in his arms. Dongmin pushed Sanha into the first available dressing room and dumped all the hangers into Sanha’s waiting arms before leaving. 

He sat down on a couch in the waiting area. He drummed his fingers on the armrests and let his gaze wander over to the reflection of himself in the mirror across the room, which he assumed people used to look at their outfits with their family and friends present. It made sense for such a fashionable menswear place.

The florescent lights were very bright, and Dongmin found himself suppressing a headache - he’d been to too many of these menswear stores today. 

Suddenly a door swung open to his left and Dongmin started, turning to look at it. A man stormed through, and Dongmin's mouth went dry. He looked amazing. Dark brown hair flopped into angular eyes that reminded Dongmin quite forcefully of a cat’s. His whole body was fluid lines, only accentuated by the suit he was wearing. Dongmin just blinked. 

The man stood in front of the mirror, nervously adjusting his cufflinks, which is Dongmin’s opinion was wholly unnecessary as he was drop-dead gorgeous. Bangin’. Hot stuff. A _solid_ ten. 

“Okay Rocky, I’m really liking this one, so maybe you’ll get you wish and we can leave,” The man said, sounding fed up. Dongmin looked around. He was definitely the only one there. Where was this guys friend? “Anyway, thoughts? I like the way it falls on my shoulders. Hemline is great too. But what about my ass? The overall fit? Rocky, just tell me - do I look good?” 

When the man stopped speaking, Dongmin had two options. One, don’t say anything. That would be an awkward silence from hell. Dongmin immediately rules that out and turns to option two. Option two, answer his question. And Dongmin does.

“You look like you could win a pageant,” Dongmin says, and the man turns around, shocked. His eyes fall on Dongmin and a pretty pink rises in his cheeks as he blushes. Dongmin internally winces because god that was so cheesy and so, _so_ gay. 

They just look at one another for a moment longer when Dongmin finally swallows and chokes out, “Um. I’m. I’m Lee Dongmin.” The man smiles, biting his lip. Dongmin tries not to swoon. 

“I’m Moon Bin, but you can call me _anytime_ ,” Bin says, grinning. His smile is bright and energetic, like a dog’s. Dongmin’s mouth falls open and he feels his face turn red. Bin is rummaging through a bag on the floor, presumably his. He pulls out a piece of paper, scribbling something down.

“This is my number. Seriously, do call me anytime.” His cheeks are still dusted a rosy pink. “Unfortunately, I really have to buy this and find my friend because we’re best men for our best friends wedding, and unfortunately we need to get these suits ready because the wedding’s in a week, and -”

“Wait, you’re the best man and you aren’t getting a suit until a week before the wedding?” Dongmin’s eyebrow raised. How did you just forget something like that? If his best man forgot that, he’d probably kill him.

“I can feel your judgment all the way over here, Lee Dongmin,” Bin stated. “So I’m gonna go. Use my number, yeah?” And then he’s gone. Dongmin clutches his heart and falls backwards onto the couch.

Sanha emerged from the dressing room. “Well, I’ve narrowed it down to fifteen different blazers, so this shouldn't take too long…” But his voice fades out. Dongmin wasn’t listening. Instead he just ran his fingers over the small slip of paper in his hand, numbers scrawled out in blue ink, the name Moon Bin hastily scribbled above them. The paper was a bit worn - probably from being in Bin’s bag for so long.

As he ran his fingers gently over the numbers on the paper, Dongmin felt like a high schooler again, daydreaming about handsome Moon Bin with his cat eyes and bright, puppy-like smile.

———

“Minhyuk, I’ll kill you.”

“I said I was sorry! I brought you food! How was I supposed to know that you’d hit up the first hot guy you saw with the worst pickup line ever conceived?”

“ _You can call me anytime._ Fucking murder me, Minhyuk.”

“Listen, I knew you were gay but I didn’t know it had gotten to a point where you can’t function.”

“Oh my god, shut up. He just texted me.”

“Despite the awful pickup line?”

“Minhyuk I’m going to cry, he’s so beautiful, help me.”

“Please _do not_ cry, these tuxes cost a _fortune_ \- dammit Bin.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hey!! I hope y'all enjoyed this short lil crackfic lmao this was too random, but I'm actually pretty happy w it.  
> This was inspired by @astrofireworks on tumblr! One of my fav astro accs on that site rn!  
> If u like leave some kudos and comments! I'd be honored!  
> For more astro related content, see my instagram: @puppycat___ (thats 3 underscores!!!)  
> thanks for reading!  
> -robin


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